I'm Trying To Do It All Tonight; I Got Plans

If there's one thing I can brag about, it'd be that I have a great circle of people around me.

Speechless

daoifhawriufh always!

I'm A Motherfuckin Monster

Rough cut but this is a great music video imo

All of the Lights

All I see is fireworks

you've applied the pressure

That It Is, That It Is.

Maybe We Can Go To

I don't give a fuck about Swizz Beats. Alicia can get it LOL

World Series Attitude

For the times when you just gotta get on your grown man shiet lol!

But You Gotta Believe In Something!

logic over bitches

We Like Beer!

Self explanatorial?

Call Me Tree Swinger Dan

Late pass.

Swingin tree to tree, seeing what's good with that pine tree over there.

Bobcat

"I just don't use "beautiful" in conversation anymore. It's lost its real meaning to me. I can't describe a girl as beautiful because it'll always either be true but played out or an exaggeration. I find other ways to describe how i feel about beautiful things."

Looking For Trouble

When the Celtics got together a few years back, they centered their team around Ubuntu. The Heat team this year doesn't have anything like that; they're just friends. It's too early to say anything really about the Heat, but it'll be interesting to see how everything plays out in the end hahha

Wondering If

This looks like a cross between a video that a high schooler made and one of those cheesy karaoke videos

I Know About Popular

This play was pretty fuckin sick.



Too bad nothing materialized out of this

I Can't Love You This Much

"I love you, you love me, we're committed to each other, I'm not going no where, you're not going no where, why can't that be enough?"

I Love You

dfjsoiahfuwoiarg this is me.
0:57 that's me 90 percent of the time.

Let's Play The Blame Game

cOLD Says:
November 9th, 2010 at 3:55 pm
ever get off the phone with your chick, and felt like the life was just sucked out out of you by the end of the phone call. Damn.

she talking 100 mph and gonna ask am I listening why you not saying nothing?. Da fuck you wont give me a second to interject, smh.


LMAO.
I love the c-section at Nahright.

Paranormal Activity

I learned about these fuckers in my entomology class. These shits right here have had me staying up late at night and struggling to fall asleep lately. fdjiosahfalieruhge

IF I WAS SINGLE !!!

(whisper) joey.....

Michelangelo And Five Year Olds

http://www.kdwb.com/mediaplayer/?action=ondemand&item=20619341

I love Kanye West's interviews. He's been a little over the top with a few things before, but everything he does and says is something I love from an artist. Lump him in with the other artists that I openly dickride.

Pause.

Oh I Love It, Then I Hate It, She's My Favorite

(Bobs head)

Emergencyyyy

Oh man, I dunno what to say. This is touching.

i'm bout to take you higher

i love singing melodies. kpeacelate

I'm Gonna Take My Time With You

There's so much value in a night out with someone you care about. Whether it be a Friday night spent playing a video game with a best friend or a date with a friend at an amusement park, spending the night ones on one with someone that you truly care about every once in a while is one of the best ways to get away from the bullshit in your life.

Before I'm Gone

I have a big distaste for bad grammar.

I have pretty bad handwriting.

Idea>platform>grammar+syntax

I Created A Monster

I need my friends to make sure that I stay grounded and don't change too much from the person that they know and love. But if I'm changing for the better, they should be able to allow me to change, even if it means that I become someone different from the person they know and love.

Zooey 101

Just how "God Bless America" was meant to be sung.

Brostep?

I was looking to download the original song, but couldn't find any links. Came across this and it's just as good as the original. Gets me so hyped hahaha

Counting All Different Ideas

Mm, the things i would have done to gotten tickets to that concert(no homo). Phoenix bringing Daft Punk out? Madison Square Garden has all the best events.

Runaway

Just because it's mandatory.

Tell me it wasn't really cute when "All Of The Lights" came on.

Political Ether

LOL poor guy

Standing In Line To See The Show Tonight

I. Love. The. Red. Hot. Chili. Peppers. I can't wait to hear their new stuff, although it sucks that John Frusciante is done with the band. I don't know much about Josh Klinghoffer, but boy does he have some big shoes to fill.

I'm Behind You

219293325


"Two great live groups. Two great sounds. One sweet song."

-You Aint No Picasso



N.E.R.D. + Daft Punk. A match made in music heaven. I can only imagine how sick the visual for this is gonna be.

Download Link

Half Black Half White

"I’m envious of friends of mine that have great committed relationships. When people call home to check on their girl or they say, ‘I’m not going to go out tonight. I’m just going to spend the night with my girl.’ That hits me, man. I just don’t have that.”

-Drizzy Drake Rogers

Just one of many great Drake quotes. I wish I had written down all the great Drake quotes I've ever read or heard.

Music Is Meant For Consumption

I've been listening to these albums a lot lately and it reminded me that I used to hate "boom bap" hip hop. When I was growing up, I had a few cousins and friends that would recommend "boom bap" songs to me. I would give it a listen and agree that it was cool. However, I was turned off to the music because many times their recommendation came with a comment that "the stuff you listen to is trash! Radio music/bass heavy/synth heavy music is terrible! You need to listen to this stuff!"

I didn't mind the recommendation. I love being suggested to music that other people love. The thing that turned me off was the way that I was suggested to listen to the Little Brothers, Slum Villages, and Tribe Called Quests of the music world. It's great that you'll hope that I'll give them a listen, but to diss whatever I choose to listen to at the moment as well isn't a very good way to get me to listen to what you want me to listen to. Surely, if most everyone who recommends me to this music is intolerant of the music that I listen to, then the music that they're recommending to me supports this idea of intolerance of other's musical tastes, right?

That led to me deciding that I wanted to be tolerant of what other people listen to. I could care less what you listen to, as long you listen to what you want to listen to, regardless of outside influences.

The major use of music to me is to enhance or get you through different moods. I'll listen to mushy love songs when I'm feeling all mushy gushy about a girl, I'll listen to hardcore/ignorant rap when I'm feeling violent, and so forth and so on.

I could care less if you listen to soulja boy or the Beatles. The biggest thing that I look at when I see someone's musical tastes is whether or not that person genuinely listens to that music for them or if they listen to it because of outside influences.

I love this "boom bap" music. Obviously not everyone who listens to it is intolerant as far as musical tastes go. Some are, but that applies to any other musical genre. In fact, I've met some of the coolest people that I've ever come across and related to them because of our shared interest in "boom bap" artists.

I Need To Pee!

It probably won't be as good as the first one. The first one was absolutely one of the scariest movies I've ever seen. But goddammit, I'm excited to see this. Now there's a dog and a behbeh? FUCKKKKKK

ItsKingsleyBitch

I love this dude. I'm not too much in the know as far as pop culture goes, but this dude gives a really entertaining view on things. Naturally, I don't agree with the dude on everything, but he's entertaining as hell haha

I've Got To Be Unstoppable

I'm young, energetic, and in relatively good health. So why not make mistakes? Why not fuck up? I'm mature enough to know when my decisions might be too risky, so why not make a bunch of minor mistakes? What better way to learn? What better way to live?

A friend gave me a good analogy to describe this idea. Someone can tell you that putting out a candle with your bare hand will burn you. Knowing that, you might never run your hand near an open flame. However, if you never dare to touch the fire, you'll never be able to describe how it feels to be burned. Quite frankly, I'd say "fuck it", dive right in, and burn myself.

Would It Bring Us Any Closer/Take The Weight Off Of Our Shoulders?

"Can we afford/To be that open/With all of these emotions"

As a general rule, I try to be as brutally honest as I can, especially with my emotions. I've failed multiple times, but lately I've been making strides towards achieving my goal of complete honesty when it comes to my emotions. Honesty both with others and with myself.

You Make My Dreams Come True

I want to be a film composer. I want to have that power! I want to be the dude who can be like, "Yo, we need to play blah blah blah right here, right when the guy and girl realize they like each other. We need to play blah blah blah when they realize they might not be good for each other. We should probably play blah blah blah when they realize the trouble is worth the effort." I got some good songs in mind hahahaha

You Better Hold This Very Moment Very Close To You

I remember seeing this commercial for the first time when I was young! Such memories! Btw, Eddie Jones and Michael Finley? Definitely early 2000's hahaha

Cuz In The Daylight Anywhere Feels Like Home

COSIGN! I love girls in sundresses. But they still have nothing on women's fashion in winter.

This Is My Journal, This Is My Therapy

When I finally get to see this dude live, and he does Exhibit C, there's a 110% chance I'm gunna spaz out.

I Can See You In Your Wedding Dress

!!! Love this video

Or You Can Do It All The Time

LOL LET'S GIT ITTTTT

Shout out to Nikki Estanol for showing me this

Dear Moleskine

I need to find an artistic outlet.

Republicans Buy Sneakers Too

I was unfortunate enough to have not been old enough to vote when the presidential election was being held in 2008. Now that I am old enough to vote, however, I'm not too sure how I feel about it.

I'm not too much in the know as far as politics go. If I were to vote, I wouldn't want to go into it blindly, so I would probably do some last minute research. I'm talking a 1-2 hour search on candidates and what they stand for. Then I'd go and vote for whatever policies I agree with.

This leads me to wonder if I really should be voting. I wouldn't be very much educated on the matters I would be voting for. Philosophically speaking, I more or less follow Kantianism. This being so, I ask myself questions like "if everyone voted like me, would the world be a better place?"

I'm not too sure it would be. I think I might have to do my part and look much more into politics than I currently do.

So Don't Think I'm Pushing You Away/When You're The One I've Kept Closest

It's that wake up before sunrise and make coffee music. Or the music you listen to after a rough day. Either way, I love this album.

On another note, after winning the Mercury Prize earlier this month, The xx have no plans to put out a second album. I love this move by them. I fully expect a second album by them, but by saying they aren't going to rush it, they're saying that they're going all "quality>quantity," an ideal that I fully endorse. A lot of my favorite artists follow the same philosophy(read: Jay Electronica.) So do you, The xx, do you.

Today Was A Good Day

Ice Cube On Kobe's Image Reinvention:

What we all gotta realize is, when we see these young stars or these young entertainers or athletes, you usually see someone that's going from a boy to a man. If anybody really thinks about what they've done to go from a boy to a man and all the mistakes they've made, and if they was under that spotlight, they wouldn't be so critical of a person like Kobe. For what you really want him for, to me, he's the ultimate. You want him on the court. All you should care about is what he does in between the lines when it comes to being a Laker fan.

But if you really want to get into the man's life, all the way in there, of course you're not gonna like everything he does. You know what I mean? Of course you're not gonna like everything he says. Of course you're not gonna like every opinion he has. But if somebody makes a mistake or two and you go for the venom or go for the throat at the first mistake, you never really had love and respect for this person, anyway. You don't give them the room to be human. You don't give them the leeway to be human. He's a great basketball player, but he was speeding down the highway. He's irresponsible and he's this, and that, and the names. And people pile on."

Co-signed! I'm telling you, the only way to understand someone is to love them. It's hard to understand someone if you can't empathize with them.

Via Land O'Lakers

Hi. My Name Is Russell.

LEGO!

Mindfuckery

WTF!!!!

Spotted at Not Suitable For 56K.

Florence And The Machine

I'm creeped out.

I Can Speak To You So Honestly I Can't Even Run Any Game

With the change in season comes a change in playlists.

Amel Larrieux>>>>>>>>>

Oh Baby You, You Got What I Need

I'm going to start going to these damn music festivals. Fuck any and all excuses hahahaha

There Is No Time To Behave, Let's Both Get Carried Away

One of my new favorite bands. Big ups to mi hermana for putting me on to them.

MEow

In case you weren't aware, the dogs>cats rule still applies.

Spotted at Noquedanblogs.com

I Know The City Gettin Ready For Me

"Nothing is original. Steal from anywhere that resonates with inspiration or fuels your imagination. Devour old films, new films, music, books, paintings, photographs, poems, dreams, random conversations, architecture, bridges, street signs, trees, clouds, bodies of water, light and shadows. Select only things to steal from that speak directly to your soul. If you do this, your work (and theft) will be authentic. Authenticity is invaluable; originality is nonexistent. And don’t bother concealing your thievery — celebrate it if you feel like it. In any case, always remember what Jean-Luc Godard said: “It’s not where you take things from — it’s where you take them to.”

-Jim Jarmusch

I Live For The Nights That I Can't Remember, With The People That I Won't Forget

I firmly believe in efficiently squeezing in as many meaningful experiences as you can into your day.

However, when your body tells you to slow your roll, you need to listen.

Good Friday

These songs that Kanye's leaking every friday via his Twitter are pretty damn good.

This Is Something The O.G.'s Called Composure

Good beat-check
Cheesy lyrics-Check

Villematic

Yes sir.

Ego Versus Humility

Learn to control both.

Gravity

"Umm, this is a song about... making sure you still love yourself... making sure you still have your head on, making sure you still say no the way your mom would say no. And I will need it every damn day of my life because it's easier to mess up than it is to stay here."

Come Pollinate Me, Hey

"To be a couple in this day and age of instant gratification and always searching for something better, to have found happiness in each other is a phenomenal thing."

To Hell With You And All Your Friends

There are a lot of people in my life who say things like "I wanted to (insert exciting thing here) so badly!"

There aren't enough people in my life who don't have to regretfully say things like that very often.

I Love The Lord, But Sometimes It's Like That I Love Me More

I recently had a new found friend call me the "coolest n*gga what, coolest n*gga what." I thought it was one of the coolest compliments I've ever received hahaha

That's Why I Pick And Choose

The more we make decisions that we support by saying "because I'm a girl" or "because I'm a guy," the more we separate the sexes. This drives me crazy because I don't think we were very different to begin with.

A big stigma I hear is that guys are heartless, emotionless bastards. This really bugs me because guys have emotions just as much as girls do. We are all human and we all have emotions. We all feel pain, both emotional and physical. The only difference is in how we choose to deal with that pain and those emotions.

The difference in the way we deal with the pain and emotions doesn't result from a biological difference of the sexes. The difference comes from being different people. Different people will react to different things in different ways.

Premeditated Murder

"Am I changing right before your eyes?
Becoming someone you don't recognize"

"Do you love me like you used to?
Even though I ain’t that n-gga that you’re used to?
Remember back when I was broke, you would fix me?
Do you prefer the broke me or the rich me?
The broke me couldn’t buy you meals, not even a value meal/
And now I pay for everything, how you feel?"

And Like Can Lead To Like Like

Sure, this isn't as cute as the version in the episode, but this is still pretty cool lol

Only Time Can Know You

Is it better to never be content with where you are, to always strive for more?

Or is it better to learn to be content with what you have?

On one hand, the possibilities are endless if you never stop giving it your all.

On the other hand, if you are constantly giving it your all, you're never allowing yourself to step back and enjoy the process and everything you have at the moment. I'm pretty sure that it would be very draining as well.

I hope to never become too greedy. I would like to be content with things when things are good. I hope I never reach the point where things are never good enough for me because I'll always be wanting more.

The xx

One of my new favorite bands. Every song by them is crack.

Ya Don't Lie

From Bill Simmons' ESPN Mailbag.

Q: Soccer still isn't going anywhere in America for this reason: People like me, who only watch soccer whenever the World Cup is on, are hated by actual soccer fans. They would rather have us not watch soccer at all rather than start watching soccer and rooting for the U.S. during the World Cup. It kills them to see people watching who don't normally. I have heard people say things to other people along the lines of "you don't even know the rules" and "if you don't know what's going on then don't watch." Ironically, diehard soccer fans here are actually hurting soccer's progress here in the U.S..
-- Brandon P, Zanesville, Ohio

SG: You just introduced a premise called "The Cult of Status Quo." Sometimes when people become die-hard fans of something that isn't mainstream -- a writer, a band, a player, a TV show, a sport or whatever -- they want to keep that thing the way it is over seeing that thing take off. Why? Because it's cooler to like something that isn't mainstream popular. Because mainstream popularity begets bandwagon fans and people who aren't as sophisticated about that product. Because it's more fun to love something before it takes off than after it takes off.

Hence, it's easier for original fans to dump on newer fans than to tolerate them and hope they advance the cause of whatever they like. I notice this every time I mention the UFC or poker -- there's this bizarre (and totally dismissive) backlash, as if I'm not allowed to watch those sports or even mention them because I'm not a real fan. Well, how do you become a real fan? By liking a sport without disliking the core people who like it. So it's a self-perpetuating cycle, and as weird as this sounds, the original fans like it that way. It maintains their ownership of the product. When the product outgrows them (specifically in the case of a creative entity), that's when the core fans start throwing around phrases like "jumped the shark" and "sold out," mostly because they're bitter it's not just them and the product any more.

With soccer, die-hard American fans love the World Cup itself, but they hate everything that comes with it; the World Cup drudges up the same storylines they've learned to despise ("Soccer can't take off unless X, Y or Z happens," "Our best athletes don't play soccer," "It can never be big here unless there's more scoring" and "They should get rid of offsides," to name four). I don't blame them for reacting negatively to that stuff, but you wouldn't call them welcoming, either. And they have taken a ton of crap over the years, which tends to harden the line between real fans and everyone else. I can tell you that in the past 15 months, when I wrote about soccer a few times and it became clear that it was more than a bandwagon thing, and that I was actually starting to understand what I was watching -- the feedback from die-hards has been tremendous (and much appreciated). They just need to be a little less condescending with neophytes.

For fun, I asked David Hirshey (soccer historian, author of "The ESPN World Cup Companion") and Michael Davies (TV producer, World Cup blogger) for their takes:

Hirshey: "The question of authenticity among fans is hardly soccer-centric. I started watching 'Mad Men' after the third episode had aired. I have a friend who became obsessed with the series once the first season DVD came out. Now he never misses an episode. Are we bandwagon jumpers? Sure, if you want to view it that way. Me, I just want everyone to love soccer the way I fell for it back in the late 1960s -- when you had to walk 10 miles (OK, blocks), in the snow, just to hear the score of a Man U-Arsenal game. Does being a fan for the past 40 plus years make me any more legitimate than someone who embraced the sport this summer because Landon Donovan scored a dramatic goal in the World Cup or Diego Forlan has great hair? Absolutely not. Are there still so-called 'die-hards' who want soccer in this country to remain a kind of secret Skull and Bones society where membership is passed down through generations? Sadly, yes. I say De Jong them in the chest and tell them to get over themselves."

Davies: "I completely agree that many die-hard soccer fans in the U.S. have learned to become just as annoying and condescending as die-hard soccer fans in England and all over the world. Globalization is a wonderful thing. But that doesn't seem to be the main premise of the Q from Zanesville. What BP is actually arguing is that soccer still isn't going anywhere in the U.S. And whatever Glenn Beck says, it's just tough to argue against the empirical data -- TV ratings, website traffic, bar tabs. They're all going up during and around soccer games. That seems to indicate that however annoying or casual the fans are, or however annoying they are to each other, they are still watching. Yes, the World Cup more than anything else. But U.S. interest in the English Premier League and Champions League and the ratings and website traffic surrounding those leagues is growing significantly, too. There are even people who watch Major League Soccer. And that may be the biggest miracle of all. And the biggest proof that soccer must be going somewhere here. It's like Daniel Kellison's [former executive producer of 'The Man Show' and 'Jimmy Kimmel Live'] heterosexuality test: Any man can have sex with a model, but only the most heterosexual of men can bring himself to have sex with a truly unattractive woman. The fact that American soccer fans can sit through 90 minutes of MLS is proof of a love of soccer beyond anything the rest of the world can possibly fathom."







I particularly like this dialogue about trends and how people act when they're before or after the trend. It's really fascinating stuff

It Started With A Small Challenge

I don't see too much of a difference between the sexes. Other than the obvious difference in organs, I think that damn near everything that's considered a difference between sexes is something that all people go through.

The only thing that really seperates sexes is the different definitions of masculinity and femininity that we see each day. These definitions have a big impact on our development, but I believe that it's small enough for us to not allow it to affect us, once we acknowledge how shallow some of the different definitions of masculinity and femininity are.

So when people tell me that the reason for an inequality or difference between sexes is "because she's a girl/he's a guy," it reallllly irks me.

It's Guy Love

One of my favorite episodes of Scrubs. Makes me wanna go to the theatre haha

K-OS - Zambony

Zambony from Khv on Vimeo.

Never checked this guy out but I like the drums on this song.

Yump

I came across this song while looking into the whole crate digging culture. That shit is crazy. I half wish my passion for music manifested itself through something like crate digging.

My Thoughts Completely

"I think the key is not to compromise. Make great music and let the mainstream come to you. Don't be afraid ya'll! There's nothing wrong with being mainstream, as long as it's on YOUR terms. Mainstream does not necessarily = wack."

-Mayer Hawthorne

It's a Shame

I feel fortunate to be a second generation Filipino-American. I don't really have a culture to relate to. I had nearly a clean slate to begin with. I didn't really have a sterotype to conform to. I couldn't really relate to the struggles of living in the ghetto. I couldn't relate to living a rich life. I wasn't exposed to only one kind of culture, although my location limited me to a mostly southern California lifestyle. I'm not "supposed" to be one thing or another. I control who I'll become instead of having stereotypes and others' preconceived notions shape my identity.

It Went Really Fast

Word to the girls who are so pretty that I avoid looking in their direction at parties.

Word to girls whose voices are soothing.

Word to girls who are so pretty that I can't help but stare at them at parties.

Happiness

"I have somebody that I'm in love with and I'm happy, I'm smiling everyday."

"Dang, I got an extra $100 on my check, my car's running, my girl just made me some food, and I'm straight, I'm happy."

Zara

I used to find no value at all in fashion. I used to think of clothes as simply a way to cover up. I thought that spending a lot of money on a wardrobe was a waste of a very valuable resource. To some extent, I still believe these things.

However, my views have changed considerably. I've realized how much power a nice outfit can have. It's a great feeling to go out and know that you look great in whatever you're wearing.

I've also realized how much of a statement you can make through what you choose to wear as well as what you choose not to wear.

I used to hate the idea that you could learn anything about a person by the way that they dressed. I didn't think that there was any way you could know anything at all about someone because they dressed a certain way.

I've learned that you really can learn about someone by looking at the clothes they choose and choose not to wear. You just need to be careful at the way you're analyzing things.

All these thoughts about fashion had me wondering what my clothes said about me. I had this lengthy and personally deep description about it, but I unfortunately forgot a few things. Here's a few things that I remember.

The outfits I wear definitely fit my personality. It tells the story of a kid that's unsure of himself, someone who's still trying to figure out his identity. Sometimes I like to put out this facade that I'm rich. Sometimes I take pride in the fact that I don't have very much money at all. I'm not someone who dresses nice all the time. I do, however, like to delve into the world of higher fashion every once in a while. For the most part, I value comfort over everything else.

I'm really happy that I was able to break through and find another way to build on my identity. I hope to build on that and find other ways to find what makes me, me.

You Promised Me You Would Never Change

I'm not afraid of change; I actually embrace it. I believe that I can take anything and adapt to it in a healthy way because of my beliefs and values. I can take "negative" things and filter out the things that I feel are unnecessary and take only the things that I find worthwhile. I like to hope that I'm constantly changing and adapting as opposed to remaining stagnant and not progressing.

However, I'm not proud to say that I don't like where I'm at right now. I don't want to be too emo and list everything that I'm unhappy about, but now that I'm stepping back and putting things into perspective, I definitely need to start getting on top of things. I can't help but sit here and wonder how the fuck did I get here? A few of my close friends have not only noted the ways that I've changed, but described to me why they don't like the ways I've changed. I really hope I can turn things around and improve my ways.

Luckily I'm on summer and I don't have very many obligations on my plate. The stage is set for me to make strides and work on improving myself. There aren't any excuses I can afford myself.

Who Would've Thought

I used to go through my life carefully, thinking out the ways that I wanted things to work out. I would be very careful and calculated about everything I did. My life was great this way, but I came under some pretty harsh criticism from some people that I care deeply about. They accused me of not "living life" and told me that I needed to stop thinking so much and just "live life," whatever the hell that means haha.

I gave in and entertained the idea of not thinking things through as much and instead running through life as a young and naive kid, making stupid decisions and not thinking things through as much.

Now my life is just as great as it was before. Not much has changed really although I have made decisions much differently than I would have previously. This has led to a lot of unwise decisions, but I cherish each experience that I've had as a result of this lifestyle change.

That being said, a big thing that helps with this change has been stepping back every once in a while and reflecting on what has happened with my life lately. This happens on many different levels, whether it be on a daily, weekly, monthly, or yearly basis.

The past few days have been laced with all kinds of these reflections. This flood of new posts will be a bunch of things I've thought about lately but haven't gotten around to posting.

Through The Park

I know I'm late on this, but here's a cool video about driving around. lol

I'm getting a new laptop tomorrow, so expect a shitload of posts about my NY trip and other random musings.

No more of this one post a week shit. hahahehe

Power

I've never been one to get good grades. This was usually because of laziness, but even when I wasn't lazy, I would never strive to get the best grades I possibly could. I justified this by thinking that I didn't want to turn into a slave for grades. I never wanted to turn into someone who cheats, complains too much about low scores, and do unreasonable things so that I could get a high grade. I don't think I've ever even went to a teacher and argued for a better grade.

That being said, I'm going to change my ways in school, starting Fall 2010.

This Would Be a Beautiful Death

I think that it's important to think thoughts out completely and to try your hardest not to stop yourself from developing thoughts completely. That being said, I've definitely thought about "weird" things, such as suicide and homosexuality. I've thought a lot lately about the consequences of committing suicide as well as how my life would be different if I were homosexual or were to become homosexual. I'm not seriously considering suicide and I'm not homosexual, but I'm glad that I can think honestly about these matters.

21st CenturySchizoidMan

I saw two girls yelling at a third girl today. It got me to thinking about why girls can be so catty. I think that in some cases, it's because some girls are so used to being treated like princesses and queens that they develop a sense of elitism that doesn't fare well with other girls. I don't think this is the root of all cattiness but it seemed to be the case today with those three girls.

I Forgot What It Feels Like To Be Normal

My laptop recently broke(as did my ps3), I lost the cord that connects my phone to headphones, and I'm getting killed by all of my finals. On the bright side, I got a new ipod, am about to get a macbook, am about to go to New York, and summer is almost here!

With no laptop to upload music to my ipod, I took all of my sister's old music. I've gotten a bunch of music that she would listen to back in the day. Back then, I didn't really like it, but I love this shit now.

I Won't Let Them Take You

Bemis struggled with different ideas for the record and decided the album should focus on "the artistic struggle, the fact that every creative person has this sick ambition to affect some sort of change in society with their art, to be more than just a guy in a band or a poet or a sculptor."

All I See Is Fireworks

There's a girl in my class with a pretty big scar on her face. She talks to me every once in a while and I can't help but look at her scar. Sometimes I'll just give her a quick look while I'm talking to her and then look away quickly. I hope this is enough to establish eye contact, but I'm not really sure what she thinks of all of this. I'm glad that I talk to her. She seems like a friendly person, although she's gotten the cold shoulder from a couple of other students. Today, she talked to me for a while, covering her scar with her hand the entire time, and it was cool, but I hope that she doesn't think I'm weird for not looking her in the eye when we talk.

All the Girls Who Played Me, Eat Your Motherfuckin Heart Out

When I'm bored or when its really awkward in class, I like to write random poems. This is something I wrote about this kid in my class.

I'm young
I'm stubborn
I know what's best for me
Or maybe I don't
But I'm doing me
And you're just a critic
So fuck you
I'm doing me

I'm not particularly proud of this poem, but I do appreciate this kid for providing me with some entertainment. He's a great example of someone who you might disagree with, but if you take the time to empathize with them, look at things from their point of view and consider their circumstances, there's a good chance that you could find a way to love them.

Even though I've never formally met you, I love you, random angry dude in my class. You found ways to brighten up my day and I thank you for that.

This Can't Be Life!

I'm a student of life.

My ego tells me that I'm very good at what I do. I know a lot about everything. Nobody can school me on the things I've chosen to look into. Does this make me cocky? Yep. Does this make me naive? Yep.

But am I immune to criticism? Hell no. If I can learn from you, I probably keep you near and dear to my heart. I love you for that. I am a student of you. As much as I front like I'm above it all, know that I'm the student and you're the teacher.

So who do I believe? Me and my ego or you?

Purify

I just read a few articles about bottled water vs. tap water and it's got me thinking. Basically, bottled water, no matter what form or shape it's in, is bad for the environment. There are a few benefits to bottled water, although there are a lot of misconceptions about it. Pretty much, tap water typically isn't bad for you. It might have an aftertaste, but it won't harm you.

Here's a good link if you want to read into it further: The Bottled Water Controversy

Herein lies my dilemma. I live in Riverside, CA and San Diego, Ca, two places with some of the worst tap water in America(true shit, look it up). I used to love drinking water from the tap when I was younger, but as I got introduced to more and more different tasting waters, I grew to love some more than others, and pushed tap water to the side. I've found myself drinking Arrowhead water religiously, at times drinking up to 8 bottles a day.

Is this hurting the environment? It'd be a lie to deny that. Am I going to change? It'd be a lie to say yes. I refuse to drink this nasty ass tap water coming out of my nasty ass faucet. But would I deny tap water from a restaurant? Definitely not, that shit is nearly always clean, as long as they restaurant keeps up with food regulations and whatnot.

So here I am. I'm an ignorant rebel who is hurting the environment. I don't know what to feel about this. hahaha

Btw, Arrowhead is spring water(read: good water) and Dasani is just purified tap water. Shots intended.

Showin Love

The best water out there. Anyone who argues otherwise is misinformed. Yep.

One More Time

"We care less now than we used to about what critics say about our music. We liked the track, Romanthony liked it, we can be disappointed about what they said about the song, but still we liked it. It’s just music, it’s just entertainment, and as long as we believe in it that’s what is important. It’s what we wanted to do. We love to be able to use instruments the way we want to. Criticizing the Vocoder is like asking bands in the ’60s, ‘Why do you use the electric guitar?’ It’s just a tool... no big deal. Creation is interaction. The healthy thing is that people either loved it or hated it. At least people were not neutral. The worst thing when you make art is for people to not even be moved by it. Love and hate are interesting because it’s deep and intense. It’s one side of our music that people might be sensitive to and others might not."

-Thomas Bangalter on the autotuning and heavy processing of "One More Time."

I personally cosign his belief on using autotune. Some artists just happen to use it better than others.

Put You Above Me

I learned today about subtle ways that women are put under men. One of the more interesting points is how it is rare to find a woman higher than a man on a picture. Men are supposed to be taller than women and if they aren't, they need to be shown on a higher position than a woman in any given picture. I never really thought too much about this other than "that's just how it is." This is a cool topic to think critically about. I'm even considering making it a point to slump down in pictures to make girls appear higher than me. hahaha

Tough Guise

This video highlights a big part of growing up as a young man, especially in America. I find it hard to respect other guys who buy into this "tough guise." Seeing someone who needs to be dominant and in control, and will go to extreme lengths to gain this control, will rarely ever gain my complete respect.

I like to think of myself as a decently tolerant person. However, I struggle with being tolerant of people who are quick to be violent, wish to be violent, yell over opponents in arguments, and belittle others because they feel the need to have be dominant and have control.

Take Me

Teedra Moses ft. Raphael Saadiq - Take Me

One of my go to songs when it's cold outside.

Hop Up Out My Bed

MTV Shows

Anyone who defends soulja boy is cool in my book

Super Smash Bros. Melee

One of my favorite games everrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. This game is so much more intricate than you can imagine. The Smash culture is really interesting as well.

I'm Sick and Tired of the Loose Rap

I remember when I was younger, on random trips to vegas or random places around California, I would look at skylines of mountains set against purple clouds and dark blue skies. The unique picture made my imagination run wild. I would imagine that the dark, giant mountains were evil castles and that one day I would journey to those castles and fight the knights, dragons and alligators guarding those castles.

Looking back, I had quite an imagination. I think I still do. But I think that as I've grown, these wild dreams of mine have become casualties to my life as a responsible adult. I've got a hundred times more things to worry about now than I had back then. I'm sure that if I didn't have so many worries and so many responsibilities, that I'd be able to dream these wild dreams still.

It's odd because when I was young, all I wanted was to have these responsibilities. I wanted to be able to drive. I wanted to stay up late. I really wanted to be able to buy food through a drive through(lol). But now that I have that, a part of me wants to go back to when my life was much more stress free. Don't get me wrong. I love being an adult with all kinds of responsibilities, especially because I can handle all of it most of it. But I need to be careful to never lose my childish innocence and my wildly naive dreams.

I'm going to strike a good balance between being a responsible adult and being a stupid and naive 10 year old.

Shock Me

I need to be careful. I really miss being in a relationship. I miss the intimacy and the comfort. I miss the passion. I miss cuddling up, drinking hot chocolate(I don't mess with coffee lol) while watching scary movies. I miss the satisfaction of knowing that I really matter to someone, that if I were gone for too long, that someone would miss me.

I have an addiction to this feeling. I'm not too sure whether or not this is a good addiction or not. On one hand, I've done some really great things because of this feeling. On the other hand, this feeling has had me reaching for anything that resembles the feeling at all, even when the resemblance was completely false. I've gone after girls that I had no business going after, only because I needed a fix for my addiction. These girls were no where near what I really wanted, let alone what I needed. I see cute girls at parties/random gatherings and I'll flirt with them, even if they're not what I'm really looking for. I need to be careful with my addiction, because I might not always make the right decision.

Sometimes I just want to give in to temptation and get with a girl just for temporary satisfaction. Who knows, maybe I'll be weak and succomb to the temptation. But I'm trying my best to not fail. I don't want to relapse. I like the direction I'm headed in. I'm going to be careful with my actions and choices. You'll know because the next girl I get with won't be a girl I get with solely for temporary satisfaction. She won't be just any other girl. She will be someone I feel truly compatible with. She'll be someone whose goals I agree with and help to accomplish. She will be someone I see eye to eye with. There'll be no more getting with girls just because it's fun. I'm focused goddammit.

She Got the Power in Her Hand

If it feels dangerous, if it feels risky, you should write it down. It makes for the best creative writing out there. Write it all down, especially the stuff you are most afraid of putting down on paper. Even if you end up throwing it away later, it shows courage to get out your most terrifying ideas/thoughts/feelings on paper.

Hello there!

I've seen a lot of girls in cute outfits today. It made me wish that I could somehow "like" their outfit, similar to liking a status on Facebook. If only, if only. Haha.

Tonight's Aspirations

Whether you check this blog often or if this is your first time checking in, this post is for you.

It's been a year since I started this blog. These are a few thoughts that I have about this blog.

I originally started this out as a simple outlet for me to get out random ideas, and it's become something a little more than that. At first, I just wanted a place to put things that I wanted to put on facebook as a note. I noticed that I started thinking of more and more ideas of things that I wanted to share with anyone willing to listen.

I've always found solace in having a forum to get out random feelings, thoughts, ideas and all kinds of other random things. This blog has proven to be a great tool for me to grow through. I write down all kinds of lingering ideas that I don't want to forget. I jot down random thoughts that I don't want to forget or don't want to be able to deny ever having.

I've posted things that I'm not proud of as well as things that I absolutely love.

I look back at some of my posts and think "wtf was I thinking?"

My blog is named "Tonight's Aspirations" because it reflects what I wanted this blog to become. I often find myself wondering what my plans are for the night. It's this look to the near future that I wanted to capture with some of my posts. I feel like that's something that a lot of people can relate to. I write a lot of things here that I hope that other people can relate to.

After writing so many posts, it's inevitable that I develop a voice in my posts. I don't know how I would describe it, nor do I know if I even keep it constant enough for it to be classified. I feel afraid sometimes that this voice isn't enjoyable to listen to. Maybe it is. I don't know.

I realize that as with most blogs, a lot of my posts are hit or miss. I look back and see posts that I would like to delete, but I don't because I believe that the same reason that I make those posts is the same reason that I make the posts that I absolutely love.

I've only been asked about my blog a handful of times. Each time, I've been afraid that the person I was talking to didn't like my blog. Maybe they thought I was too pretentious, maybe they thought my posts were boring, or maybe they didn't like how plain and boring my layout is. I was pleasantly surprised when each talk was a positive one. Please don't be afraid to talk to me about my blog, whether it be through a comment on a post, through IMs, or better yet, in real life. I love talking about anything and everything I've ever posted. Whether you agree or disagree with something I've posted, or really liked a video or picture or whatever else I've posted on here, I would love to hear your thoughts.

Thank you for supporting this blog. All the support is overwhelming.

Around the World

I know I never told you
Cuz I never felt the need
But now it feels appropriate
So lemme get you up to speed
I never thought that when we met
We were together planting a seed
That would end up blossoming
Into a flower, not a weed
It's too bad that flowers die
Because otherwise we could feed
The world forever with our love
So instead, follow my lead
We'll be attacked by a butterfly
Who in turn will spread it's wings
And spread our influence outward
Eventually everyone will see
The strength of our relationship
And the reason why we can be
So frank and honest with each other
How nothing ever comes between
The integrity of our love
But now we're a dying breed
It was worth it in the end
At least it was for me
Because you made it all worthwhile
And now we've been set free
So I thank you for everything
What you represent to me
Is more than words can explain

Procrastination

Pontius Pilate

I feel dirty.

Iron Mike

“When you guys show me love, I hate you. Because I don’t like myself. So we’ve a got a Catch 22 with my own identity. That’s why I’m very harsh, very tyrannical. I don’t care whether I live or die. I don’t give a fuck about any of you. But I do.”

- Mike Tyson

Curitiba, Brazil

I learned about this city, consistently hailed as one of the most eco-friendly cities in the world, in my environmental science class.

Some random facts I remember from lecture:

The city recycles two-thirds of its refuse.

Parks are maintained not by lawn mowers, but by actual shepherds! *mind blown*

Has one of the best economies in the country.

One of the best public transportation systems in the world, including a great bus system that runs in and out of each suburb around Curitiba. The buses run on an honor system; individual tickets are cheap, and often aren't checked at all. However, there is a steep fine for anyone caught without a ticket.

High on my list of interesting places in the world that I wouldn't mind visiting one day.

A great article about Curitiba Here.

Jimmy's Story

It seems like I only fall for girls that end up doing me harm. I aim for the girls that take the breath of everyone in the room. I think that that quality in the girls I get with end up hurting me in the end.

You better be the one I've been hoping for. You better be the one that won't hurt me. Because if you aren't, I don't what kind of guy I'll become.

Taking Matters Into My Own Hands

When I find myself spending money frivolously, I justify it as "my own personal stimulus package."

I'm going to regret this later.

"You Go Girl!"

Watching tv shows and movies like "House" and "Scrubs" helps me realize how stressful it must be to work in the medical field. There's a lot of touchy issues that must really try at the characters of the nurses, doctors, and even the janitors and cafeteria workers at a hospital. I'm sure that everyday life working at a hospital isn't as dramatic as it seems on tv or in the movies(they are just entertainment after all), but there's definitely some reality behind those stories.

It makes me wish that I could be a doctor or nurse one day. I feel that I could handle the stress and weight of a hectic job like one in a hospital. While I wouldn't very much enjoy some of the duties(like explaining to someone that their disease is fatal or having to deal with unruly family members), I believe that I could bear that weight better than a lot of people.

It's not that I really wish to be a medical doctor or anything. Contrarily, I'm pretty bad with math and the natural sciences. But I do wish that I could take the tough parts of those jobs and put that weight on my shoulder because I believe I could handle that stress.

That's Exactly What's Happened Here Tonight

man, i’m the one
and you should let the boys know too[two]
show them niggas every single thing i showed you
i’m here feeling like 50 back in ‘02
and everybody saying i’m the man…so true
but what does it take to feel secure
a place with wooden floors
space to put awards
a couple of parking spots
maids to do the chores
the cars you always wanted
the women that you adore
well i got it, i got it
i wonder if i’d be happy without it
i doubt it
i really try not to think about it
i made it but i’m still playing like i’m being scouted
til’ i’m outed
game time bitch
i know your proud of us
king james shit!
watch me throw the powder up
this og got my whole suite clouded up
and i bet you i’ll be out of town
before i’m outta luck
they ain’t rooting for me
they ain’t clapping for me
i’m always saying “can’t someone just be happy for me?”
i really hate to say i told you so.
so i bite my tongue,…but you know you know.

This is the stuff that has me excited for Drake's "Thank Me Later." "Over," "Find Your Love," and "Shut It Down" are sorta subpar, but I can't wait to hear the finished product. "Fireworks," "Miss Me," and "Light Up" are going to carry the album, at least I hope so.

Francis and the Lights

I gave their other stuff a try; it just didn't really resonate well with me. This stuff is pretty cool though

Motherfuckers Around You

I don't feel very comfortable when I have pressure to make use of every minute of my time. Having pressure to dedicate the next hour of my life to writing an essay and the hour after that on running through homework makes me really uneasy. I've figured that a big part of who I am wants to minimize that time in my day and to maximize the time in my day that I can spend doing nothing or at least have peace of mind in knowing that I can afford to not do anything too productive with my time.

As with most things, there are pros and cons to having this pressure, as there are pros and cons to having down time. I have to live with the cons of my lax lifestyle, seeing as I like to maximize my down time. I'm constantly adjusting my lifestyle to place myself in a position where i can live with the cons, while maximizing my enjoyment of the pros.

This Isn't Tom and Jerry

These things are absolutely vicious.

Note: Not for the squeamish or easily offended

Standing In a Field of Daisies

I found myself writing lines in my head today. These past few posts are all that I have to show for it. Writing this all out helped me to realize some things about writing poetry/lyrics/whatever these are. I'll get into the ideas this writing provoked before I put up what I've written.

First, it is really difficult to end your piece of writing with something fitting enough to end it all with. I really wanted to end these with some really cool punchlines, but nothing came to mind worth putting down, so I'm left with stories with no ending.

Second, neither of these are too personal. I know that most of the art that I consider great comes from very deep and very personal parts of artists, so when I try to bring out the artistic side in me, this is one of the first things I take into consideration. However, these two bodies of work aren't too personal to me. I guess they're personal in the sense that I was able to think of these lines because of my past experiences, ideas, thoughts, and feelings, but neither is directed to or written about one person in particular. In actuality, I don't think any of them are about anything in particular. They definitely aren't very specific, at least.

To be honest, I'm a little bit afraid of writing anything too personal. I know it'd make for some good writing, but I'd have to choose something really near and dear to me. Then I'd have to go and write something so eloquent that it matches how much that event means to me. I think that it'd be too daunting a task. Even if I were to complete something like that, I'd always question the quality of that work.

Hopefully I can keep working on writing stuff, and I'll be able to build on everything I've done. I'm gunna be sure to eventually write things that hit closer to home for me. I also hope to be able to finish off these kinds of things with a fitting enough ending. Having to cut these things short gives me such a big feeling of disappointment.

3

Damn I just can't believe this shit
I feel like I'm going crazy
My thoughts are flowing freely
But my dreams are getting hazy
I swear I'm trying my hardest, man
I'm putting in all this effort
I just hope all this happiness
Will last me until November
I'm under the umbrella
That thinks you should never say never
And all of this is great, you know
I want this shit forever
But I'm keepin it real
I know it might not last
So we should enjoy it all
Let's not forget about our past
Because we can't simply go
And sweep it under the rug
Just because it was bittersweet
Had pros and cons, just like a drug
So let's soak it all in
Every little memory
All the inside jokes
About "dishonoring your famiry"
Let's also remember all the times
That we fought and disagreed
It might not be very pleasant
But there's definitely a need
To remember it for what it was
And not what it wasn't, because you see

2

As much as I hate to admit it
You know I'm scared shitless
That you don't like what we have
And you're planning out how to quit this
Maybe that's the source of my fear
Maybe that's why I'm afraid
That you don't realize what I've been through
The dues that I've gone and paid
Cuz I'm putting in twice the effort
That I lead you on to believe
Putting us in a position
For us together to succeed
So when it doesn't work out well
I end up feeling the need
To somehow make it up to you
Or maybe this is greed?
Who am I to be so lucky
To have everything I possess
What have I done to deserve this?
I guess I'll just confess
That it might look like I know what I'm doing
But I'm just trying to impress
It affects everything I do
All the way down to how I dress
I guess I'm thinking too much?
Maybe it's for the best?
But I do appreciate the fact
That you're putting me to the test
So if you're having second thoughts
Then I guess I can't really blame you
Just know that all of this is real
I don't think I could ever hate you
I love everything about you
I've seen your best and I've seen your worst
Is this because of that one time
I had a fiery outburst?
I still don't know why we're through
I guess maybe we're just cursed?
Looks like we're not gunna last
But I love you because you were my first

1

I always find myself wondering
What is it that you see in me?
Do you see my cocky side
Or rather notice my insecurity?
Is it enough for me to be kind
Or do I need to be more?
Because I'm growing less and less sure
That I'm kind-hearted to the core
Trust that I'm doing my best to please
Each and every one of you
But you can bet your bottom dollar that
I'm not doing any of this because of you
Rather, I'm making the decisions that I make
To make myself happy, to make myself proud
And I do it by the book
I do it by following what's allowed
Cuz while you're steady trying to find shortcuts
Trying to find the easy way out
I'm still doing everything you're doing and more
That's a big part of what I'm about
Cuz I'll accomplish everything a cheater can
And even more on top of that
All while having a sense of honor
And keeping my integrity intact
Cuz when I was growing up
My Dad and I had made a pact
To do the right thing
To never stray, and that's a fact
So go ahead and try to corrupt me
This drive just can't be hacked
Cuz you're working with luck
And I've got my work ethic, smarts, and tact
In the small chance that I were to fail
And do something badly, something wack
I wouldn't worry because
I'm surrounded by people who unquestionably have my back

If I've Offended Any Horses...

I trust this man to guide the Lakers through the playoffs.

Please Don't Be Scared of Me

A lot of people I see are so obsessed with chasing down the win that they are blind to the positive effects of taking a loss. They'll stack all of their chips on the side that more ensures their chances of winning but they're losing out on what they could stand to gain by taking what is in actuality a small loss for them.

This is Bullshit!

gorillaz tcr int

I've always liked everything about the Gorillaz. From their music videos, to their album covers, to those weird live shows, and of course, their music. I can't believe they did this on the Colbert Report. I wonder if they'll ever reveal themselves, hahaha

I guess they have already? I wonder if this is the first time they've shown their faces? Are the Gorillaz comprised of more than one person? Either way, I'm pretty sure this is Damon Albarn.

Fireworks

money just changed everything
i wonder how life without it would go
from the concrete
who knew that a flower would grow
lookin down from the top
and its crowded below
my 15 minutes started an hour ago
truth over fame
you know i respect the blatant shit
when i hear em talkin
i just dont know what to make of it
haters so familiar to me
im slowly embracin it
it doesnt come naturally
bear with me if it take a bit
yeah
and my dreams are who im racin with
but you could see im pacin it
so that im always chasin it
wayne put me right here
thats who i get the paper with
i hope that my success
never alters our relationship
yeah
this life is something i would die for
octobers own
but its lookin like july 4th
but i just hope they let you try it first
this time its really goin off
fireworks

im just such a gentleman
you should give it up for me
look at how i placin all my
napkins and my cutlery
i could tell it wasnt love
i just thought you fucked with me
who couldve predicted lucky strike
would have had you stuck with me
i kept my wits about me luckily
what happened between us that night
it always seems to trouble me
now all of a sudden
these gossip mags wanna cover me
and you makin it seem
like it happened that way because of me
but i was curious
and i'll never forget it baby
what an experience
you could've been the one
but it wasn't that serious
there was smoke in the air before
and that was me clearin it
that felt good
all in all i learned a lesson from it though
you never see it coming
you just get to see it go
yeah
i should've looked up in the sky at first
now i could see it in her eyes
fireworks

Happy Earth Day!

Me and My Mob

Fuck a dog, fuck a cat, I'm getting me a kangaroo when I grow up.

Random facts about kangaroos:

Regarding their ability to defend themselves:
Kangaroos and wallabies are adept swimmers, and often flee into waterways if presented with the option. If pursued into the water, a large kangaroo may use its forepaws to hold the predator underwater so as to drown it. Another defensive tactic described by witnesses is catching the attacking dog with the forepaws and disembowelling it with the hind legs.

Regarding KEEPING A JOEY FOR YOUR OWNNNNNN:
Occasionally, individuals take on the task of rearing a recovered joey themselves. The rule-of-thumb says that if the joey is already covered with fur at the time of the accident (as opposed to still being in its embryonic stage), it stands a good chance of growing up properly. Lactose-free milk is required, otherwise the animal may develop blindness. They hop readily into a cloth bag when it is lowered in front of them approximately to the height where the mother's pouch would be. The joey's instinct is to "cuddle up", thereby endearing themselves to their keepers.

All of this via wikipedia, of course.

I Can't Live Without My Radio

More hip hop comedy for that assssssss!

Ho Ass Trick

LOL at the awkwardness

Little Does Everyone Know, I Actually Wrote This

This and more at my cousin Joy Erika Diwa's blog.

Her playlist alone makes her blog worth checking out.

I Will Have a Model Wife

Someone needs to make a movie/write a book/make a tv series about:

The story of the community college kid. I know "Community" has a lock on this, but i'm talkin about something less comedic, more dramatic. I knowwwwwwww there's a great story brewing from the story of a community college kid.

The story of people trying to immigrate to the U.S. The anchor scene would be the immigrant making it to the U.S. and they're on the flight, reflecting on their journey.

I'm TELLING YOU, this would work!

Offise Spase

More offices like these here.


I've always kinda thought that I would absolutely deplore being stuck in an office for my entire career. But modern offices like these might make life like that a lot more enjoyable. Actually, I think I would demand for my office space to be something like this. hahaha