i've been doing more growing than usual lately, in terms of knowing what i want in a romantic relationship. i've been learning a lot about what i want in my significant other, and that's also helped me learn a lot about what i like and don't like about myself. i think that everytime i've found a romantic interest, it's acted as a catalyst to the learning and growing that i do everyday. the relationships have acted as stimuli that challenge my ideas, thoughts, and each idea and thought branches out into hundreds more ideas and thoughts. i do a lot more learning about myself when i care about someone else then when i'm single and focusing more on me.
this isn't to say that i'm dependant on relationships; contrarily, i consider myself to be very independant. i've gone most of my life without needing to be in a sexual relationship. i feel like i'm a very competent individual who doesn't need to be in a relationship. however, when i am in a relationship, i think the relationship makes me want to be a better person in every aspect of my personality. i don't know whether to attribute it to my significant other making me want to be a better person or what, but i do know that i like that i'm a better person when i'm in a relationship.
some interesting quotes from songs i've been listening to:
"what if we happen to kiss, then we touch, put a rush on it, get it over with, what if i just know, what you like, and it feels right, then it's over right? what if i don't call you back, prove you right, all this lasts, just one night? maybe we should slow it downnn"
"this could be something, this could be something, this could be something, maybe it's just nothing at all..."
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